Is a book on the highly improbable and it's impact. Which is something very smart educated folks have a hard time forecasting. In fact it is impossible making it all the more devastating when things like 9/11 happen. When I finish it I will give my opinion at the moment I am too involved and still mid book. I am also reading a book about two writers who were best friends. One being quite physically handicapped (no lower jaw) but outgoing and the other being shy introverted but whole and quite pretty. They both struggled to make it as writers and maintain their friendship and so far so good but stuff happens and it is all quite sad.
I welcome sadness it helps me to be softer and more compassionate toward myself and others. My go to personality is sunny and underneath this is a fault line of sadness. There is nothing to complain about and yet there is...always something we can sit down and gripe about or the fear of losing my grasp.
Maybe it comes from being adopted and kind of a permanent guest or at least that is how I was raised. Never quite welcomed more tolerated. My take on things.
It's difficult to be a great friend.I fancy I am a great friend there is nothing I wouldn't do for my friends. I know when my pals want to give me hard information like don't eat so fast (I do) stopping drinking before I feel drunk (sometimes) I am impossible, I get upset, not so much because people are wrong (they never are) because I have been discovered. They have seen where I am broken and afraid.
Aging isn't easy not so much because it just marches on and there is no stopping time. It is hard because for me I almost never know what I really look like or feel like or think even. I am always caught a little outside myself "that's what I look like"?
It feels bad...I know most people are the same that doesn't bring comfort. In fact that is a bullshit saying "misery enjoys company" no misery wants a break and needs distraction.
Yet it isn't normal to be always aware of everything exactly either, balance. What do we do when we know how someone is going to turn out? Do we offer our predictions?
No we don't because like a "Black Swan" there could be something glorious like improbability, proving it all could come right and they could succeed against all odds.
Gathering facts with common sense and knowledge doesn't factor in the improbable, or it's possibility. I like that it gives me hope for me and my friend.