Thursday, December 10, 2009

Our Path

Reading one of my Google widgets which informs me whenever somewhere on the web something is printed about me. Most of the time it's pretty cool and positive sometimes it's rather scathing and in this case brutal. It was regarding a syndrome a "where are they now" syndrome. It used to be called the Shelly long syndrome but now it's become the RDC syndrome. Ouch...It serves me right for being vain and keeping tabs. I heard or read that Kevin Bacon uses this handy widget so I am in good company. Now I didn't feel as bad as I could have or would have maybe ten years ago. I mean I am way off the grid and living a life and no longer grinding the offices of casting people. I kind of like it...no I lie I am loving it. This life has perks that that other life didn't. One of the things we miss as real citizens of the world is maybe the big hoopla that goes with working in films and T.V. the money is very sweet when it comes. Otherwise I am a clam that is happy here in the real world with you. Still I have dreams of seeing my work my writing produced and getting a chance to direct again and again and maybe act occasionally and who knows? Yet this exile could very well be that, the end of that life for me. I will never do it (act) again. So how do I feel about it? I feel like a lover of reality and if that is my reality then I welcome it with a huge grin and open arms. How famous does want need to be? Mind you being reduced to a syndrome is a wee bit hurtful...do I make them itch? Sheesh, next life I promise to be quieter and less needy for attention. Okay that is the gist of it. I was as a child desperate for love and found the attention I got from performing a welcome solution to unmet needs. Until I got healthier in the late 80's and early nineties and stopped needing that kind of love. So that is my deal. I got healthy and shifted and maybe it all coincided with my losing interest in the Hollywood machinery and honestly my time had come and passed these things happen. I reckon it happens over and over again we get to recreate ourselves no matter whether it's in Hollywood or somewhere in Iowa we get to reinvent our lives. So here it is today a reinvention of sorts. I am constantly being asked to write a book (not by publishers) but by friends here and fans on FB. I need guidance, plus I am a wee bit stuck about what to write about. I could take a few routes I suppose and be helpful and funny or deliriously self absorbed like this blog is starting to feel. Apologies to my friends here...I am in recovery for being outed as a "syndrome" never easy this name calling no matter what YOU say. Okay so I need to get off my butt and do this thing write a proper book, only what is proper and what could I possibly have to say?


I don't know.

2 comments:

glt said...

Oh! This is beautiful...meaning YOU!
This real writing. This is the first page of your book. Now, you have to focus on the growth of your spirit without relying on the crutch of any organized religion. You are the Love Syndrome! So what if you're the Granny Moses of truth and self-expression? Har! Seriously, I'm learning a lot about myself on FB, and it ain't all pretty. Most people seem to put up with me, but the one's that tear in to me hurt quite a bit.
I'm getting the message that I need to keep working on change for the better. I think you might like to contribute something to history of a very positive nature. I understand. It's a tough calling for a us mere humans...

glt said...

Sorry, forgot how to do the"follow-up comments" thing, so I have to post again...LOVE!

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