Last night hanging with dear old friends we were outside enjoying the early evening California temperatures which if you live here are the norm but since moving to lovely New England I now have a renewed appreciation for warmer weather. I still prefer it in increments not all year round. I understand our need to have warmth but I need to have frigid cold as well. There is something spiritually soothing to me about winter and it is my favorite season. I can be outside running around in it and not be bitten by blood sucking creatures. Nothing is more disturbing than deer flies attacking you. One of my friends stood up and asked if I would help her find a man. She is ready so she says for love. I am of the school of being as honest as possible to myself and to my beloved pals. So the truth for me I have discovered after realizing that I have been a complete failure setting people up, is that we are single because we WANT to be. We are unemployed because it is where we need to be, even if we don't remember or know that we created it. I know its bullshit whoo hoo stuff to some, not to me. I think it gospel. I think we are these magnificent power stations of creativity if we accept it. I think our truest identity is GOD force. We are huge monumental creators if we step in to it. The powerless the abused and the forgotten stance or mode of operating is choice. I know I stand in tricky territory but I can promise even in the most extreme cases there is a millisecond of collusion and choice before we are enslaved. So I suggested to my lovely friend that she needs to find her No and change it to a yes vibrationally. She needs to align her selves into one whole and get clear about her vibe. Her outward energy she is sending forth. If it is negative even a little bit no one who is worth their weight in gold will be attracted to us. No one, It is universal law. I love “The millionaire match maker” Patti Stanger. She is right about a lot of stuff regarding love and real connection. Most of us don't want what we deserve. We want what we think we need. That is two very different things. No worries though because life kicks our ass and makes it impossible for us to be full of beans. It doesn't do our bidding. If you want to become an actor to fulfill unmet childhood dreams chances are unless you have a corresponding talent and desire that is based on something life affirming you will not have success. It doesn't happen. If you want love to make a child and to fill your evenings with distractions and to serve our unmet needs it's not likely to appear. Love is about sharing and unfolding, transforming both as one and as individuals inside couple-dom. It is as much about the other being as it is you. Most of us are not so good about sharing life. I think a committed study regarding love and intimacy and selfhood vital before embarking. That is in an ideal world. Plus if you are lucky your lover will be developmentally in the exact place that you are and together you can grow up and unfold within the unit that is your relationship, its fun. Honestly no one can fix you up for love or anything unless you are ready and willing to be in it.
The big question last night is are you willing?